Dirt, Breakfast of Champions?

Ah, what a woefully unnatural profession web design is! You sit for hours on end, staring at a screen two feet from your face, while moving nothing more than your right hand as it grips a semi-circular glob of plastic. To make matters worse, you're probably drinking an artificially flavored soft drink infused with obscene amounts of high-fructose corn syrup. Well now, it may be time to mix a bit of soil-borne bacteria from your home-grown veggies to that healthy diet of yours!

Researchers are discovering that growing your own food—however much or little you can do—is better for your health than anyone ever suspected" says Psychology Today. Research showed that when "certain strains of soil-borne mycobacteria" were ingested or inhaled, they "sharply stimulated the human immune system." Thus, says the magazine, "it looks increasingly like ingesting components of the soil itself might be as critical to human health as the very finest fruits and vegetables grown on it."

Would you like a side order of dirt with that order? It's good for you!